How To Deal With Annoying Family Member — 30 Days Writing Challenge
“Why so skinny now?”
“Biomedical Engineer? What can you do with that degree?”
“Why didn’t you bring your boyfriend?”
Ideally, we’d love all our family members and look forward to spending as much time as possible with each and every one of them. However, in the real world sometimes we have to deal with a different condition. There must be one family member who asks infuriating questions whether on purpose or not like the example above.
Personally, I’m blessed with a super liberal family member in general. I don’t have any relatives that consistently frustrating to deal with and borderline toxic, they all are chill and open minded. Although sometimes they’re unconsciously asked infuriating questions too. Then how do I cope with my family member when I’m in this situation?
- Accept them as they are
First of all, pause. Take a breath and relax. Your relative has probably been the way they are all their lives and they’ll most likely stay that way. There’s a saying, “You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your relatives.” Yes, it won’t be easy to accept the truth. They’re someone you’re related to, however they would affect you anywhere near is much. But trying to change them or expecting them to change would just make you more frustrated. You cannot control your relative’s thoughts or actions. The only thing you can control is how you react to them. So, accept that and try to focus on whatever minimize your distress.
2. Don’t take things personally
It’s hard not to take things personally, especially when they attack your personal stuffs or made you feel responsible for someone else. They might do that due to the summation of both their love for you and their personal experiences, that may be both biased and outdated. We all have natural talents and attributes that can help us cope with adversity. These include gratitude and humour, social intelligence and forgiveness. Whatever yours are, find ways to use them.
3. Limit the interactions but don’t avoid them
Avoiding to speak or interact with them would make you seem offensive. Say hello, politely answer a few appropriate questions, then move on to others when they look satisfied enough with your response. Try to be respectful to others as much as you want to be respected.
You are completely entitled to your decisions, dreams and desires. Focus on who you are and what you can do to deal with annoying family members as your ultimate strategy. It is your life and they have theirs. You’re the one who control your emotions, don’t let anyone frustrate you.
-d-
