The Idea of Loving Him — A Series of Personal Journey

Loving him is not
to shelter myself in him;
it´s building a shelter together,
with our hands,
where the whole world can fit in.

Loving him is not expecting something from him;
is simply waiting him,
in the silence,
without knowing where he is or what he does
at night and in the day.

Loving him is not
to demand from him,
it´s not forcing him,
it’s not to put pressure on him,
is not doubting him,
is not defeating him;
it´s to help him to break free from himself,
from me, from it all,
it´s to give him my breath,
to feel him under my skin
without any desire,
nor an objective.
It’s to make him feel deserve.

Loving him is not projecting
ideas about him, it´s not idealizing him;
it´s to see him from afar, from up close,
from inside,
from outside,
see him beyond me.

Loving him
is not always being close to him,
is not always thinking about him,
is not always dreaming about him;
it´s to be there through his high and low,
it´s to be become one with him,
it´s to be aware of his dreams,
and of mine with him,
it´s allowing him to know me completely
all the way to the very center of my pain,
and of my love.

Busan, 28 Mei 2020

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